Baking 101: Almost an Epic Fail

image(1)So in January I decided it would be so much fun to take on a 12-month challenge where every month I focus on a new and exciting challenge and then blog about it.

Wrong. Not fun. I kind of hate myself for signing myself up for this thing I made up, which I now have to do for the rest of the year. Yay for publicizing my goals!

Mid-January rolls around and I have not baked a single thing. People are curious as to how it’s going and I don’t blame them—I was also curious—mostly because I hadn’t started yet. I finally found it in me to pick a recipe, make my way to Walmart and purchase everything (and I mean everything) one would need to bake. I wasn’t happy about being at Walmart—which I actually believe is the strangest place on earth—I had road rage and I spent two hours going from one end of the store to the other. Did you know they sell everything at Walmart? Seriously, I could live there and never need to shop anywhere else. It’s like a little village—there’s even a mani/pedi salon and McDonald’s!

Ok enough about Walmart. I decided to bake Nutella Cupcakes, which seemed easy enough. In all honesty, aside from feeling frustrated about following a recipe, it was kind of fun and even a little therapeutic. I put too much batter in the cups and over-baked them, but they still turned out ok. I ate one and gave away the rest—at least I’m winning in the self-control department.

Here’s a little video of me baking—you can watch it if you’re bored or procrastinating.

I baked the same cupcakes a second time and they turned out MUCH better. This time I ate two. They smell like heaven and taste like unicorns. Don’t judge me.

I had all these grand plans for baking pies and cheesecake and banana bread and molten chocolate lava cake—but sadly, reality set in and I realized I’m not Martha Stewart, nor do I ever want to be. And the number one reason being:

I hate the clean up.

And I’m not really sure why I would spend HOURS (literally) trying to bake something that’s going to be half as good as something I can buy ready-made. The only joy I actually got from baking was starting and finishing a project and watching people’s expressions as they ate my goodies. That’s it. Sorry, not good enough. I can do better things with my time—like watch the entire first season of Girls in 48 hours.

Oh, I also baked these cookies for V-Day (I decided to continue baking in February. Shut up). I don’t need to disclose how many of them I ate because I would like to hold onto a shred of my dignity.

Will I bake again? Perhaps. Will I clean up the mess? Never. Will I ever go back to Walmart? Maybe if the world was ending and I had to take shelter somewhere. Next up is Knitting but it might have to change—I already feel like a grandma, the last thing I need is to sit at home on a Saturday night and knit scarves.

Also, I’m considering writing an entire post on Walmart.