Endings and Beginnings – Part I

129306449-pecs-hungary-gettyimagesI can’t believe it’s 2013—I’m still in shock and have decided to spend the next few days preparing for the New Year (cleaning, organizing, planning, avoiding reality etc.)—I realize it’s January 3rd but who really looks at a calendar anyway?

When I started this blog I wanted to focus on life lessons, so it seems fitting that I should share what I learned in 2012 with all of you. I categorized it because I learned in 2012 that people have a much easier time reading structured content…(that one was a bonus).

Lessons from 2012:

Work/Business – You have to do whatever it is you’re afraid of. I took a plenty of financial risks last year not knowing if any of them would pay off (most didn’t), but it was the best thing I could have done for my professional self esteem—now I know what I’m capable of. People have the tendency to over-think and over-plan and overanalyze until they’ve talked themselves out of doing anything at all. Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith, which doesn’t mean you’re throwing caution to the wind and becoming a hippie, it means you trust yourself, your experiences and your character enough to handle whatever you might face in the future. Just do it, you’ll either succeed or you’ll learn so it’s kind of a win win.

Family – Ahhhh, this is a tough one, where do I start? I believe people can change if they truly want to change, otherwise, no amount of love, compassion, begging, rational or therapy will make them budge. It’s hard to accept people for who they are, especially when they are related to you, but, once you do there is a great sense of peace—you can’t control the behavior of others, even those closest to you—the only thing you can control is how you allow it to influence your day-to-day and how much room it takes up in your heart.

Love – I struggle with this, I always have, even more so the past couple of years because I’ve been forced to question what I have always believed to be important in relationships. I’ve come to realize that love is a different experience for everyone, and that’s the point of it all. For so long I was caught up in how everything is supposed to be, how a relationship is supposed to progress, what I’m supposed to look for, what expectations I’m supposed to have, how I’m supposed to be treated and how I’m supposed to feel—all of these things are arbitrary—once I realized that and accepted it I was able to be present, which is far more important than trying to ‘get it right’. Sometimes being ‘wrong’ will lead you to the right places, your instincts will never lead your astray.

Identity – This is a big one and it’s often overlooked. Everything you do, the people you surround yourself with, the books you read, the movies you watch, the battles you fight and the ones you avoid, the doors you walk through and the ones you close, the love you give and receive, it all influences your character and shapes your identity. What does that mean? The little things matter, your words, actions, decisions and lack there of, they are all tiny pixels that make up the big picture of your life. My biggest take away from 2012 was that you must always invest in your self-confidence, that is the armor with which you face the world and it cannot be compromised. Sometimes this confidence is built through seemingly shallow and superficial things (such as buying a killer suit or getting the perfect haircut) and other times it’s gained through education, spirituality and the right relationships. Whatever your method, don’t allow the evolution of your identity to fall through the crack of complacency and ignorance. You are in control of who you are and who you become, every moment of everyday, in every single way imaginable.

So here’s a toast to mark the end of 2012—endings are just new beginnings in disguise, and there’s really nothing more exciting than a new beginning.